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Sunday, February 7, 2010

We deal with Dick Wadhams, Dick Swett, Dick Armey; they should deal with Akbar Zeb

So apparently Pakistan appointed an Ambassador to Saudi Arabia whose surname, Zeb, while common in Urdu, refers to the penis in Arabic. His first name, Akbar, means Admiral great in Arabic, i.e. "Allah Akbar," so essentially, they would have been introducing "His Excellency Biggest Dick" at state functions. Under pressure from the Saudis, Pakistan withdrew him in favor of someone with a different, less controversial name.

Me, I think Pakistan should never have caved in. After all, many people feel the most important criteria in choosing a UN Secretary General is the hilarity generated by his name among Americans.

Dag Hammarskjöld, U Thant, Boutros Boutros-Ghali and of course the current Ban Ki-moon are all widely felt to have become Secretary General due to this fact.

But it's not just foreigners. We've got Dick Wadhams, the erstwhile GOP consultant once hailed as Rove's "heir apparent," until his dreams got Macacaed by his client George Allen.

Dick Swett, the former Congressman from New Hampshire.

And let's not forget Dick Armey, former House Majority Leader. He embraced the hilarity of his name in office, telling famed humorist Dave Barry that, "Yes, I am Dick Armey. And if there were a dick army, Barney Frank would want to join up."

But I guess the dick in question is just too big for Saudi Arabia to handle.

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